Coffee Thoughts

This morning, on my birthday, I drank the exact same coffee I drank on my birthday in 1995. How on earth do I remember? Because it’s Blueberry Cobbler flavored, and my house smells like blueberry cobbler, just like my grandparents’ house did on the morning of February 13, 1995.

I had just given birth to my oldest daughter (my second child) two weeks before, and my 3-year-old son and I were living with my grandparents in North Carolina while my husband toured the country with Les Miserables. Said husband was home for the birth of our newest bundle, and while shopping for groceries, he purchased this amazing coffee. Now I’ve always loved flavored coffee, but something about this smell was heavenly. And it permeated every inch of my grandparents’ house… much to my grandfather’s dismay.

Every morning, until it was gone, I enjoyed a brimming cup while I played with my 3-year-old or nursed my newborn. Until he went back on the road a few weeks after our daughter’s birth, my husband would brew the coffee and make my breakfast, and I would relax and revel in the sounds of our little family, and my grandparents in the background… both nearing 80 years. The coffee and the people and the warmth of that home felt safe. And though my family was about to embark on a new journey in a strange land called “New Jersey”, my heart and my head were at peace… at least for a while. It was 1995 after all… and there was still a bit of young and stupid in me.

Flash forward to this morning, February 13, 2024. My husband recently found that Blueberry Cobbler coffee again. And as I brewed my first cup, the smell wafting through my house… the one we bought 29 years ago in the state I now call home, New Jersey… I smiled and remembered 1995. This morning, my home smells like my grandparents’ home. This morning, my grandparents have been gone from this world for far too long and I miss them. This morning, it’s quiet; no toddler at my feet or newborn at my chest. This morning, it’s snowing like crazy outside and everyone else is asleep. This morning, I’m a mother of three adults, Mimsy of two grandchildren, and wife of almost 36 years. This morning, after my rollercoaster life that only a few truly know, my heart and my head are at peace… at least for a while. It is 2024 after all… and there is now a bit of old and wise in me.

I do love Blueberry Cobbler coffee.

Tori Burris Inkley
2/13/24

Dig Deep

Dig deep, dear soul

Deep into the dark recesses of your mind,
Your heart,
Your gut

Into that place where you land at day’s end
That place where you sit comfortably,
Right or wrong,
With your thoughts
Your choices
Your beliefs

Tell me, dear soul

What color is that place?

Is it as green as new spring grass?
Full of fresh hope for tomorrow
Abundant in growth, soft to the touch, comforting to smell

Is it as yellow as tall summer sunflowers?
Bright and promising in its quest for a better tomorrow
Shockingly brilliant in its positivity

Is it as red as falling autumn leaves?
Beautiful, but aged, having lived a full life
Yet continuing to decorate the landscape

Or is it as white as fresh winter snow?
Lacking color… or it is all of the colors
Clean, quiet, almost invisible

Dig deep, dear soul

and share your color

Tori Burris Inkley
2/13/24

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